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A PARODY COOKBOOK ON FOOD SAFETY

EggBog

The humble egg is possibly the greatest killer you have in your arsenal. It looks harmless but has brought many a restaurant to a grinding halt.

Sneeze Platter

Even a choosy patron would not turn their nose up at this fine selection of cheeses, and hopefully they will mistake that fine covering of spray with a sweating cheese.

Chocolate Mousstake

People are always fighting over our recipes, but let the coroner decide whose Mousstake it was. “Secret” ingredients make for good marketing, but not when they are cleaning products.

Chicken Seizure Salad

With a quick sleight of hand you can turn a boring Caesar Salad into something your customer will be talking about for the next week.

Oysters KilledPatrick

Forget about a dozen, or half a dozen – it only takes a single one of these to bring a grown man down. One dodgy oyster and you will have Pat driving the porcelain bus in no time.